Friday, June 16, 2006

Bad Stuff

My gran has had a stroke. Harsh as it might sound, I'm not close to her so am not that upset about it for her sake (see here), but am very worried about how it will affect my mum and my Auntie C. Auntie C has been very ill with ulcertative colitius and has to go back in for another operation in a couple of weeks time. To make matters worse, she broke her foot last week by falling over on a dodgy paving stone. My mum was obviously already very worried about her and now this has happened as well. She was struggling to cope with looking after her as she was (unable to walk properly) but now she has lost the use of one arm too, it will be too much for my mum.
Before I found this out yesterday, I was feeling pretty happy - I was feeling enthused about work again and everything seemed good for once and then this happened. I have that old feeling that somehow it is my fault for allowing myself to be happy. I know it is stupid and irritional but it always seems like there is something bad waiting to happen.

3 comments:

Lucy In The Sky said...

Wow- your last sentence is exactly how I feel all the time- terrified to let go. I hope everything imporves your end xxx

SandDancer said...

Thank you. I just read your recent entries and you do seem to suffer the same anxieties I have. Obviously I hope you feel safer soon, but it is at least reassuring to know that I'm not the only one who feels like this.

northern monkey said...

I think everyone feels like this at some time or another, particularly when we're reminded how fragile life is. Hope all is ok with you & family.