It just isn't cricket

When the OH was in Australia, one of his hosts gave him a gift of two talking figurines, "Boonie and Beefy" ( in the likeness of somebody Boon a famous Australian cricketer and Ian Botham).

They were produced by the cricket sponsors Victoria Beer and when activated they banter with each other, Boonie taunting Beefy with jibes about us being rubbish at cricket and drinking warm beer etc. They are cleverly programmed to start talking to coincide with the games of cricket starting and to then make the odd comments during the course of the game. Unfortunately the Botham one is blatantly an Australian trying to speak in an English accent which ruins the effect somewhat.




'Great more plastic tat' I thought, but the OH seemed chuffed with them so what harm could it do to allow them to live with us for a while...

Imagine my fright at being awoken at 3am by the sound of an Australian talking in the lounge. It took me a few minutes to realise that it was the plastic man rather than an intruder.
Little did we realise that once activated, there is no way of turning them off. He tried to separate them, hoping that keeping them more than the instructed distance apart would silence them, but it didn't work - they still continued their inane conversations.

For the past few weeks, they have been residing in a kitchen cupboard. We had hoped that at that distance we wouldn't be awoken by them when we are asleep, but I'm a light sleeper and every time there's a game on, I'm woken up. I thought today might have been the last time, but no England only went & won today so we are now in the tournament final, so more talking will no doubt follow.

I've no idea what will happen to them after this - perhaps they will self-destruct?